JAPANESE SPEAKING HELP NEEDED; HIBIKI

NIKPOID

Momo's Minion
ATTENTION TO ALL JAPANESE SPEAKING PEOPLE OUT THERE.

As some of you know, and some of you don't know, I'm trying to write a song; Hibiki. I'm far from a fluent Japanese speaker, but with my own knowledge and the beautiful source called the internet, I managed to translate my lyrics for it. Of course, I don't trust my own translation enough to call it correct. If anyone could help pointing out the flaws and mistakes in my text, that would be great! So please, help me! QAQ

http://nikskiej.deviantart.com/#/d5h6w11

You will, of course, be credited for the help!



Sorry for the hyperactive post, I'm both very enthusiastic and desperate. xD